We are unique. Each of us is an individual. Being this and remaining so is the job given to us at birth that continues to our death. I am that, and so are you, but not without help from our families and the world we will move into as we grow.
I don’t mean to suggest that without help and nurturing that we will not become ourselves. We are always ourselves, even if we hide behind our masks and personalities. The serious problem is that pretending to be someone other than yourself is impossible.
Of course, that gambit is always attempted, but failure with those close to you is assured. Moreover, that failure will constantly come between you, your friends and acquaintances, and those you work and live with. Living a lie has got to be hell for all concerned.
Then, why do people do this? It must begin early in our life. Parents and family are so influential that the marks inadvertently or deliberately made on our psyche are life-long scars we carry, whether hidden or obvious.
Thankfully, help in becoming as fully oneself as possible exists. It is found in and during the relationships with those I label a “leader.” Ideally, this leader is fully committed to you becoming you. They could be a teacher in school, your gang leader, a social friend, a leader at work, your mate, or maybe… and only maybe, a therapist you spend years with… And they’d have to be exceptional!
I make the case that becoming as much oneself as possible is our lifetime journey, with every experience either contributing to or detracting from our being. Never give up the fight “to be.”