What do I mean when I write or talk about being one’s own voice? We are born with our own voice; if nurtured to be what we initially are, we become that. This isn’t easy to achieve because our need for others to care for and raise us is absolute.
To begin, we cannot exist without others. They create us, and we enter life as raw selves who require much from others to make our life happen. The power in the hands of others over us is life or death. This is why gentle care, love, touch, listening, and giving are vital to our existence and becoming. As babies, we are so vulnerable that even small events that appear insignificant have a meaningful impact on us.
Yet, while we are like clay to be molded, we are not simply clay. We are unique beings who require as much help as possible to become and remain ourselves.
Admittedly, I write often about the baby and our becoming one’s own self. Still, it should be clear that no one is simply themselves, but a mix of the people who play the initial roles in our life. While we are unique, we are still our parents, our siblings, and in subtle ways, bits and pieces of many generations.
The point I’m trying to make is that our relationships with each other are amazingly complex. I look back on my family, the conflicts, living through the depression in a crowded apartment for eight, and the necessity of sharing. Even the gang I hung out with was essential to me. They were, as I see clearly now, my community. All have given much to me. I was loved as a child and had miles of freedom. This was the “soup” I was born and lived in. It all has everything to do with who I am, a unique individual who is not a copy of anyone.
Place is important—Community is even more so-—I owe it so much
Sy
