From Giving Care to Needing Care

Going from caregivers to becoming receivers of care may be what a few caregivers look forward to. However, I believe this to be a small group because of what I am witnessing and learning. True caregivers have a difficult time transitioning into needing and receiving care. They may deny this, but their behavior is their truth.

It is primarily women I am writing about because most women are Caregivers. Probably even as young girls. This is not a task most men do; they will, if necessary, but men have been the hunters, seeking to feed and care for their families in a much broader sense. With women, it is more than just care they give. It is themselves, a labor of love.

We have the good fortune of visiting nursing care here in our apartment. As an observation, the majority are experienced caregivers. Oustanding caregivers deliver from their hearts, souls, and heads. They clearly are committed to their patients. Only on rare occasions will a nurse perform their duties briefly and mechanically with no heart.

Still, the problem I write about is when it is the caregiver who NEEDS care. They simply do not take this lying down, and the battle they wage is with themselves. They are so accustomed to being the caregiver that being in need becomes a significant problem. Maybe they see this as a personal failure?

There is no preparation for this because aging is what aging is. Leaving one to deal with the loss of strength, most activities, declining health, and more, much more. Needing care is not easy to give into. Women are not alone in their fight to hang on to what they were. Yet, I believe their struggles are much different from the ones men experience. Women and men are different, which is a good thing.

Women made to give—Themselves, love and more—Boys and men need them


Author: Sy Ogulnick

Sy Ogulnick received a BA from UCLA, Teacher’s Credential from Los Angeles Board of Education and completed phase I (Master’s portion) in a Doctor of Behavioral Science program at California Coast University. Sy leased and operated a summer day camp in LA. He and his wife then purchased virgin wilderness land in Northern CA, where they built and operated a coed summer camp. They moved to Las Vegas, NV, and purchased, built and operated a community children’s program for families staying in a major resort casino in Las Vegas. They have created programs for children nationwide that employed many people and in the process developed successful training programs for personnel. This led Sy to lecture on how to train staff and the creating of community within the workplace. Sy was then invited to speak at professional conferences on how best to hire and train employees, which led to his becoming a consultant in the art of improving relationships in a work environment and eventually to his epiphany that “Leaders are the primary problem and the answer to the personnel issues that arise in the workplace.” Sy has written numerous papers on the subject of interpersonal relationships, leadership and power. He has lectured throughout the United States, has been interviewed by the media and has appeared on many radio and TV talk shows

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