Creating Your “Better Self”

A close friend invited me to write a brief paper on becoming “A Better Self.” I know this is doable for every human if (and it’s a big “IF )they are willing to give time and energy and are lucky enough to have actual caregivers in their life.

These “caregivers” I describe are also people that feel good about themselves, have a sense of personal power, and have an excess of regard and respect for each human being. They give of themselves volitionally, not because of obligation or fees, but because they really care about the people they live with, work with and meet. They have a love for humanity and give of themselves freely.

A person who’s aware of their troubled upbringing needs to know and believe that their past experiences trap them but that it is possible to overcome the ghosts of their past. Yet, it is essential for them also to know that they cannot do this alone by themselves. Professionals (Psychiatrists, Psychologists, Social Workers, etc.) may help. Still, it is the legitimate “caregiver,” the person who gives of themselves because it is who they are that makes the best medicine for a conflicted human.

How do I know this? Am I wishful in thinking that all troubled people can be made healthy? I certainly think not. But 25 years of working with many troubled and challenging children and youth has given me experiential knowledge, far more meaningful than academic/intellectual knowledge. So, I know what I know, and because I am a caregiver, I feel good about myself and have made my way through life’s challenges. I know what genuine “caring” means to a person in need of this.

I am in deep pain—-My self needs loving help—Your love can help me.


Author: Sy Ogulnick

Sy Ogulnick received a BA from UCLA, Teacher’s Credential from Los Angeles Board of Education and completed phase I (Master’s portion) in a Doctor of Behavioral Science program at California Coast University. Sy leased and operated a summer day camp in LA. He and his wife then purchased virgin wilderness land in Northern CA, where they built and operated a coed summer camp. They moved to Las Vegas, NV, and purchased, built and operated a community children’s program for families staying in a major resort casino in Las Vegas. They have created programs for children nationwide that employed many people and in the process developed successful training programs for personnel. This led Sy to lecture on how to train staff and the creating of community within the workplace. Sy was then invited to speak at professional conferences on how best to hire and train employees, which led to his becoming a consultant in the art of improving relationships in a work environment and eventually to his epiphany that “Leaders are the primary problem and the answer to the personnel issues that arise in the workplace.” Sy has written numerous papers on the subject of interpersonal relationships, leadership and power. He has lectured throughout the United States, has been interviewed by the media and has appeared on many radio and TV talk shows

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