A Memorium from Mark Shaff

A LIFE WELL LIVED

Lenette and Sy are extraordinary communicators. I say they are because they are still communicating with us. Each had their way of communicating: Lenette was direct, Sy philosophical. Lenette didn’t beat around the bush, and let’s face it, Sy was the bush.  We all know Sy’s love of the written word, and he was quite good at it.  One of his favorite ways of communicating in writing was the Haiku. 3 short lines, 1st line 5 syllables, 2nd line 7 syllables, 3rd line 5 syllables. Seventeen syllables, to say something meaningful, express an important thought or idea. It is not an easy task.  The lines don’t rhyme, so the rhythm is what is called “cutting word.” The intent is for the cadence to be jarring and abrupt. The purpose is to force the reader to think and reason out the meaning.  It is perhaps the most difficult form of poetry. So, it got me to consider, as an homage to Sy: Is it possible to describe the scope and breadth of lives that spanned nine decades and, in the case of Sy, nearly a century in one word, and more than that, could it be done with a one syllable word? 

Regarding most of us, I think the answer is NO. This is not because describing a person’s life in a one-syllable word is simple, but because describing anything in one word, let alone a one-syllable word, is very difficult and complex.  But when it comes to Lenette and Sy, it can be done. And that word is DO. Think about it! We are all here at this memorial because of DO. Those of you who attended Purple Sage, and more importantly, those who spent weeks, summer after summer, at Camp Shasta, in a nutshell, learned DO and were taught DO.  And what better setting to teach something that can only be taught by example than a camp? The same is true for those of you who Sy helped professionally. He came into your business and lives and SHOWED you how to be a better communicator, a better listener, a better human.  And as a team, it was Lenette who SHOWED Sy how to DO. And Sy took to showing DO, like a duck to water. DO is both individual and communal at the same time. DO is about helping and being helped. DO is a choice.

I am sure that Carol, I, our sons Lucas and Colton, and my entire family came into the lives of Lenette and Sy because of DO. I didn’t know it then, and I’m sure Sy didn’t either, but I’m pretty sure Lenette did. 

As it turns out, DO is the answer to everything.

It is the answer to success.

It is the answer to pulling yourself out of failure and despair. 

It is the answer to love, to happiness, to friendship. 

In fact, DO is the secret to LIFE!

And why is DO all of this? Because the opposite of DO is NOTHING. 

If Lenette and Sy could only leave us with one short message, it would be DO. DO every day of your life. DO until you can DO no more, and then find someone to help you DO. And that is precisely what Lenette and Sy did… they showed each of us what DO is…what DO is supposed to look like in the beginning, in the middle, and most notably at the end…they each chose the time when they could no longer DO…and that is the very definition of a life well lived.   

Mark Shaff

The Future of the Blog

With great sadness, I regret to inform you that Sy Ogulnick peacefully left this world on the morning of May 3rd.

He felt strongly that his words were a large part of his legacy, as was his desire to share them. In accordance with his wishes, the blog will remain online for the foreseeable future in hopes that those following Sy’s essays will comment and contribute their own thoughts on the subjects he considered important.

While Sy will be sorely missed, the blog will preserve his presence so his observations on power, leadership, relationships, and aging will continue to inspire and inform.

Sincerely,

Steve Zuckerman, site administrator.

Blood & Environment (Nature vs. Nurture)

I was thinking about Jeff and his journey with us and that there was an important message being delivered during this chapter in our lives.  The message I received while attempting to sleep may not agree with many that believe differently, but it seemed so clear and correct to me. In any case, I share my discourse with myself and do not seek agreement.

The environment, and here I mean what those in power create and use, does more to influence a person’s behavior than whatever a person inherits. So, parents, bosses, teachers, ministers, and so on, through their words and behavior, impact and influence the behavior of their children and those they lead, teach, or preach. This happens where and whenever someone in power rules the behavior of others. I find the use of power by anyone that has power and influence over others to be at the roots of their follower’s behaviors. 

This is not necessarily bad, and in fact, influencers may be full of love and care for their fellow humans. Still, there are evil people, and their love of power keeps any “good” at a distance. Power is what counts to them, and all else is insignificant. Yet, there are leaders with awesome powers that do nothing but good for those they wish to grow and give of themselves. 

My point is that the environment, which is created by another human, has the greatest impact on our behavior. As a baby and a child, is there a choice? As we grow, so does our freedom to choose our paths, so it is likely that the powers above us may have less impact on us. I have always resisted the powers above me. My read-on Jeff is that he has, too, as a child and teenager, with poor results. Thankfully, not as an adult. 

I am who I am—Because of others, mostly—More today myself

Sy